a drop

It’s all in the mind. Except it’s not. It’s very real. It’s all about what might happen. And it’s better to avoid finding out. Just in case. It’s all about control through the possibility of what might occur. Even if it won’t and couldn’t. Because it always could. It’s all about where you are, but that’s only your body. Are you really there? Of course you are. But it’s not about your body, your physicality; it’s what you’re doing. No. It’s not about that either. It’s about what you might say. No. It’s not about that. It’s about what you’re thinking. Or what you might think. Worse, what you might share in thought. Keep your thoughts to yourself. That’s the best advice I can give. Don’t even think those thoughts. Best of all, don’t have thoughts. Just embrace the day. Embrace the beach. Embrace the sun. Embrace. But don’t embrace your thoughts. Hilarious. Hilarity. Hysteria. Hysterical. No. No. No. It’s all very calm. Everything’s under control. Nothing strange is going on. It’s getting better. Just stop thinking. I’m just walking down the street. I’m just sitting at the table. I’m just going to the beach. I’m just going for a coffee. I’m going to bed. I’m smoking. No. Don’t smoke. I’m just having a drink. Just a drop, with my coffee. I always have a drop. My father did. My grandfather did. Just a drop. My mother does. Just a drop. It’s all in the mind. Not that the whisky makes it go away. It makes it worse. But it’s not real. I know that. I need to concentrate. I need to settle down. I need to find stability. I need to grow up. I need to embrace the now. Now. This is the world we live in. I can go there and look away, but it is the world I live in. It’s really better if you stop now. Just for a bit. Get things on track. That’s what we’re all doing. Getting things on track. No one minds if you do that. We don’t mind. We’ll leave you alone. You’re free to do that. Free. There is no control. You just need to get to work. Get busy. The trouble is I’ve got too much time to think. That must be it. And I know I’m not supposed to think. It’s all in my mind. My mind. I need to be busier. Busy. Busy filling my thoughts. It’s hard work. Discipline, self-discipline, that’s what I need. When I think, I must learn to discipline myself. No one else can do it for me. I must be in charge of my own thoughts. I must be responsible for myself, for my well-being. That is the truth.

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